Wait: The Art and Science of Delay. This book will tell you how to hone the ability to make slow but highly effective decisions in your daily life. In this era where everyone is so busy and the pace of life is getting faster and faster, should we keep running after this kind of life? Should we stop for a moment and consider how to find the right choice for ourselves? When it comes to decision-making, most people choose to trust their feelings and intuition. In a rapidly changing social environment, our decisions are either too slow or too fast.
We want to work with high efficiency and also want to get it done as quickly as possible. But these two things often cannot happen at the same time. This book will teach us about making slow, deliberate decisions that yield high results. The most important point in this book is to delay. Delaying is also an art in decision-making. The author of this book is named Frank Partnoy, who is a top expert in market management. He is not only an expert in law and finance, but he also has many years of experience managing famous banks on Wall Street. Therefore, this work of his is the result of a combination of various fields, from economics, law, management, and so on, creating a guide to changing your thinking and actions. Below, let's listen to the summary we are sharing with you. We have divided this book into four main points.
First point, we will talk about the nature of delay, analyzing human psychology to see whether delaying is an abnormal condition or not. Second point, how do some top individuals use this kind of slow, deliberate thinking to achieve success? Third important point, how can we apply slow decision-making in our daily social lives today? And the last point, we'll talk about how slow decision-making and the disease of procrastination are different. Let's listen to the first point. Slow decision-making is a part of life's nature; it's the same for everyone. This is something we must accept. Some people think that a decision is made in just a few seconds, so what is there to discuss? Others believe that before doing anything, you must consider it carefully. "Think before you leap," as they say. This kind of thinking is to put the decision entirely on the brain. According to an experiment from a hospital, it was concluded that all the results of our decisions are the result of an agreement between the heart and the brain. In a book titled "The Elephant and the Rider," a similar point was raised.
To put it simply, our heart can make the final and most important decision in influencing the brain, commanding the body to act. For example, when you are scared or excited, your heart beats fast, while normally, your heart beats at a regular rhythm. A well-trained heart does not easily have its rhythm change drastically, no matter the situation. You may have seen some people who are calm when faced with a chaotic situation. They maintain their emotional balance well and are not easily swayed to make wrong decisions. Because their heart has been well-trained and cooperates well with their brain, it gives the brain enough time for careful consideration. If you are angry about something and you make a decision immediately without it going through your brain, the result might be that you do something you might regret later. Understanding this reason, let's look at a type of cell that transmits information from the heart to the brain, which we call the vagus nerve.
This nerve connects the heart to the brain, passing through our body. You can imagine it's like a very long highway. It takes time to send messages from the heart to the brain, which is why people have slow decision-making. Because the information is not transmitted in time, the brain cannot react immediately and send timely messages. Our brain divides the transmitted information into two different areas: area A, which stores information for quick reactions but doesn't undergo careful consideration, and area B, which is responsible for managing information through careful consideration by the brain. To put it simply, whether it's area A or area B, this slow transmission of information to the brain is the reason we naturally have slow decision-making. The above is the first point the author wants to make. He just wants to show that it is not strange for everyone to have slow decision-making because this is a natural factor, and it's the same for everyone.
Second point, we'll talk about the secret that allows outstanding individuals in each field to use slow decision-making to achieve success in their field. Or we can say, how well do they manage their heart and brain to cooperate with each other? Let's take two examples. Volleyball players have faster reactions than those who don't play. This reaction is commanded by the A-area nervous system of the brain. It doesn't go through careful consideration, but volleyball players can react faster because they know how to receive the ball and the distance they need to run to get to the position to receive the ball that is about to hit the ground. Where they stand, where they run to, how they raise their hands and gesture to receive the ball—all of this doesn't go through consideration by the brain. But they rely entirely on their experience, agility, eyes, ears, and other senses.
These are spontaneous, immediate reactions. The brain has no opportunity to consider these things because it's too fast. But if we analyze it in more detail, it contains two important parts that we need to analyze. That is, the time the eyes saw and the time we reacted. Let's look at the time the eyes saw. In general, no matter what kind of person, whether they have played or not, whether they are a professional athlete or not. They all have the ability to see things the same in the same amount of time and situation. But when we talk about the time we react, it's very different. Those who have never trained and those who have gone through professional training have different reactions and reflexes. Those who have played can see the direction of the ball, estimate its speed and trajectory, so they can adjust their position to catch the ball faster and better.
We will see the difference between those who have played and those who haven't. Those who have trained have faster decision-making and quicker reactions. Second example, let's look at the old tiger of the stock market, Mr. Warren Buffett. One secret in his investment is the slow strategy. He is a person who can wait for a long time and is not impatient. He is not a lazy person, but he is waiting for the best time to invest. He thinks that starting at the wrong time is already a 50% failure. He spends many hours a day reading books and financial reports of the companies he will invest in. He doesn't tend to trust outside information because sometimes it's fake news. He needs real information to make the right decision.
People like Warren Buffett have a long-term vision in his investments, spanning decades. He is not only someone who is good at waiting for opportunities, but he is also a person who has quick reactions and knows how to control boiling emotions in the short term. I remember one of his quotes: "When they are cautious, I am brave; when they are brave, I am cautious." It should be noted that Mr. Warren Buffett is a shareholder who has invested $1.8 billion in the Coca-Cola company since 1988. And as of now, he is the 7th richest person in the world with a total net worth of about $87.5 billion. You will surely ask me, "I am not a national volleyball player, and I can't have the ability of the stock market god, Warren Buffett." What can we learn from these top people? In fact, these people don't have extraordinary abilities that are much different from ours.
It's just that they have trained many times, so they have quick reactions, can control the situation, and make decisions according to the situation. And the more they train, the more they do, and it makes them do it even better. They might have one special ability more than us, which is they can think and act at the same time. You have all seen simultaneous interpreters who can listen and speak in another language at the same time. This is also because they have gone through training and have collected experience and techniques they have used in the past. A normal, ordinary person cannot do this. So even if we are not experts, at least we can train, collect experience, and make ourselves react quickly. But leave enough time for the brain to make a decision. On the other hand, if you are not an expert and have no experience, when you face a situation that requires you to make a quick decision, what will you do? If it's a veteran with a lot of experience like Warren Buffett, he can use his feelings and intuition to make a decision immediately without needing a long time, and the percentage of success is also high.
But if you are not an expert and have no experience, you should not trust your intuition. The second point we have already mentioned is the strategy that top individuals use—slow decision-making and quick reactions—to achieve success in their field. Even if we are not as great as them, at least we know how to gather our experiences to serve as a basis for making a right decision. The third point, I will tell you all how they use slow decision-making in their daily lives. Let's talk about a simple structure of the human brain. They divide the human brain into two different parts: area A and area B. Area A of the brain handles problems quickly, like when you scream after being startled. It's a natural quick reaction that doesn't go through the brain's command center.
When area A makes a decision, whether it's right or wrong, the pressure falls on area B, which is the area responsible for consideration and careful thinking. We will have the opportunity to further consider what the decision of area A of the brain was. To put it simply, for example, when you are angry with someone and immediately use inappropriate words towards them, that is a command from area A of the brain. A while later, you reconsider and go to apologize to them for the inappropriate words you said. This is a command from brain system B, which has gone through a period of consideration. Therefore, in any situation, delaying is really important. Give enough time for brain system B to work first, then react. In daily life, when we speak or interact with others, delaying is indispensable. The ones who use this principle best are comedians. They know how to give others time to speak, they know how to find the right opportunity to give the audience time to laugh.
Comedians have a very good rhythm. Their speech is deliberate and clear. Even though they have memorized some sentences, they don't speak quickly. They delay, giving the listener a chance to think about the story, giving them time to finish laughing. If you don't have this skill, please try speaking slowly, deliberately, and with good breathing rhythm. It's the same in business and public speaking. You can try listening to the speeches of former US President Barack Obama. He uses the strategy of delay very well in his speeches. On the other hand, in daily life, when we do something wrong to others, we always go and apologize to them immediately. We expect that doing this will receive forgiveness from the other party. But we don't know when is the best time for us to apologize to others. Sometimes, apologizing immediately after we have done wrong doesn't mitigate our mistake. On the contrary, sometimes the other party will not accept our apology, or they might even think we are being defiant, who knows. Or they might not value our apology at all.
If we are just a little patient, delay just a little bit, a while or a few days later, and then apologize, it's not too late. And it also makes the other party feel that you have gone through careful consideration before saying the apology. They will value it even more, and it also shows sincerity in the relationship. The reason for this is that the victim needs time to process what you have done to them. Sometimes your harsh words or inappropriate actions have hurt others, and when we apologize too quickly, they cannot accept it. On the other hand, you should give them time to calm down first, or give them time to gather all the information before apologizing later. Of course, delaying an apology does not have to be practiced according to this standard all the time. It also depends on the type of your offense and the level of our wrongdoing. Sometimes, if you apologize too late, it can make everything too late as well. And if our mistake is serious, we have to apologize many times before they forgive us. No matter what, you have to find the most suitable time to ask for forgiveness from others.
Sometimes, how you apologize is not important. What is important is that you know when is the time to apologize. Another example, when you are dating a life partner, most people fall in love at first sight. After just a few meetings, they decide to commit their destiny to each other. In fact, to have a long-term relationship, you need to give yourself time to consider the other party. Or you need to give them time to show their good points or bad points too. You should not make a decision immediately. You need to give time for both parties to get to know each other's hearts and minds, and to understand and tolerate each other, then you will know if you can walk the same path together or not. If on the first meeting you have a good feeling for each other, you can meet for a second time, a third time, to understand the other party. Don't make a decision too quickly. The above are some examples where you should use delay or slow decision-making in your daily lives. Whether it's communicating, speaking, or solving small or big problems, you should use a delay strategy to help us make a good decision.
Coming to this point, we now know the importance of the word "slow" and the benefits of using a delay strategy. You really want to apply it in your life, don't you? But what if you delay until everything is too late? Wouldn't that be a mess? Below, we will distinguish and look at the difference between slow decision-making and the disease of procrastination. We can interpret that slow decision-making is a strategy of delay, of putting something aside. For example, you delay doing things that are not urgent to do things that are urgent and important first. On the other hand, the disease of procrastination is intentionally dragging out time and highlighting laziness. "I'll do it tomorrow," "tomorrow" forever. Everyone procrastinates, but if it's this serious, then you will have the disease of procrastination. The question is, how long do I have to procrastinate to know that I have the disease of procrastination?
How can I manage it? First, you have to weigh the time against the level of necessity of that thing. If that thing is urgent, of course, you have to do it sooner rather than later. And if that thing is not very necessary and not urgent, you can push it to be solved later. But you have to set a specific time when you will solve that problem. You have to put it in your daily to-do list and specify the time and the progress of your activities. On the other hand, you have to judge and clearly distinguish the action plan and the period you have to delay. For example, you decide to pay the bank at the end of this month, which is by the 30th. On the 30th, you actually go and pay at the bank. Because money and time are both important to you. As long as it's not past the 30th, you won't be fined. Therefore, this kind of delay is a strategic delay, not the disease of procrastination.
Another example, when you promise that in the new year you will stop drinking alcohol, smoking, and sleeping after 12 o'clock anymore, but by the middle of the new year, you still can't do it, still procrastinating. Not setting a clear timeline, or setting it and not being able to do it, this is the real disease of procrastination. Psychologists have found that people prefer to choose immediate pleasure over future happiness. Therefore, for us to be happy today and also to ensure happiness in our life in the future, you have to learn to make the right decisions from now on. Track our daily activities and write them down on paper. It might make you wake up. Sometimes you spend a whole day but end up not doing any substantial work at all. When you procrastinate on doing something, you need to find another, better reason to do something else instead. Ask yourself, why do I have to procrastinate?
If you procrastinate on making a PPT for a presentation at the end of this week, you need to find a reason that is more important than making this PPT to do instead, such as visiting your grandfather in the hospital. This reason is acceptable because you choose to do the important work first. But if you procrastinate on not making the PPT and instead meet up with friends in the evening to hang out and have fun, and leave the PPT aside, then you definitely have the disease of procrastination. Lastly, you need to know how to weigh the time against the necessity of the matter at hand. Know which things to do now, and know which things can be delayed for later. Prepare an action plan and use the shortest amount of time to get the highest efficiency. The famous artist Leonard Bernstein said that to accomplish a great work, you need two things: a good plan and a tight deadline. In this society, no one has enough time. If you are someone who knows how to manage time, accomplish tasks in order, and knows how to determine their level of necessity, then you might have enough time to do more things. Writing your tasks down on paper is very important. A to-do list that writes down the tasks you have to do weekly really helps you a lot. When you write it down, you have already succeeded by 50%. Because it's more specific and detailed than when it's in your brain.
Don't trust your brain at all. You have to write it down. If not, I guarantee that one day you will forget it. The book "Wait," which I have summarized for you all this week, is just this much. Below, I will summarize some of the main points again. First point, we mentioned that all our actions are the result of decisions that come from the cooperation between the human heart and brain. The heart sends signals to the brain through a long highway which we call the vagus nerve. Because this information transmission is slow, human decisions also cannot be made immediately. At this point, the author wants to mention that delaying is normal, and it's like this for everyone. Second point, we talked about how outstanding individuals in a field can become top people by using slow decision-making to succeed. We took the example of a volleyball player and the stock market king, Warren Buffett. Right decisions come from experience and training.
Whether using intuition or the brain, giving a little time for consideration is a good thing. Third, we talked about applying slow decision-making in life. For example, you should not force or be too quick to apologize to others when you have done something wrong. You need to give enough time for the other party to understand us and be considerate of us. It's the same for communication and public speaking. You should not speak too fast. You should have a rhythm and give others time to receive and understand what you want to say. It's the same with dating a life partner. You shouldn't meet and fall in love instantly. You need to give time for both parties to understand each other gradually. That's why the author named this book "Wait," wait a little bit. Last point, we analyzed and distinguished the difference between the strategy of delay and the disease of procrastination.
The strategy of delay is to prolong time but with a clear plan. You need to have a technique in judging when is the right time to do something. You delay it because you have other reasons that are more important or more urgent. As for the disease of procrastination, it is a sign of laziness, with no clear deadline. To know whether something should be delayed or not, you can take two factors to weigh against each other: time and the level of necessity of that thing. Write down the tasks you have to complete on paper and score the necessity of those things. Use your valuable time to solve the most important things and your little time to do the most urgent things.